Comments on: My (relatively) omnivorous son

By: Celebrity-Gossip-Inside-Out.com » Blog Archive » Modern manners

Celebrity-Gossip-Inside-Out.com » Blog Archive » Modern manners — Mon, 21 Sep 2009 18:27:17 +0000

[...] anyone to eat things they dislike is generally counterproductive – not all kids are going to love oysters, however much you yearn to show them off, but a simple ‘no thank you’ is better than [...]

By: Cushti

Cushti — Mon, 22 Jun 2009 02:04:51 +0000

[...] another mum’s take on raising adventurous eaters http://www.thedinnerfiles.com/?p=1086 wonderful stuff! [...]

By: LisaK

LisaK — Tue, 16 Jun 2009 03:23:58 +0000

I loved reading this. Thank you for writing it. I’ve raised my kids with a similar food philosophy, and while I can’t claim that they will eat absolutely everything, they are relatively open-minded. They’ve gone through picky stages, but as they get older, they get more accepting and open minded about foods they used to dislike. My daughter, now 15, thanks me for being adventurous (and mildly insistent) with food, and marvels at what her friends won’t eat. My son, 12, just discovered that he likes eggplant after all. And so it goes. SOMEDAY they’ll discover that tomatoes are not the work of the devil. In the mean time, I’ll keep eating them like apples in August, bent over the kitchen sink to catch the juice, and exclaiming to my children about how fabulous they are….. Because when I was their age, I didn’t like them either. It’s all part of the parenting (and growing up) journey.

By: Giovanna

Giovanna — Thu, 11 Jun 2009 13:51:10 +0000

Wonderful piece. And I agree–luck has a lot to do with it. My first two (now 22 and 19) ate most everything we set in front of them. We were pretty smug, and sure that it was due to our wonderful parenting. Then we had our third. She ate next to nothing–wouldn’t even eat mashed potatoes. Even covered with melting butter.

But we just went along, making one dinner, offering but not insisting–always having bread and salad available. And guess what? She’s now 16 and eats pretty much everything.

Serving separate ‘kid meals’ was never part of my repertoire–too much work for this borderline lazy mother! Also, it always seemed to me that having people share a meal–the same one!–was part of the joy of dinnertime. If they’re not taking part in the food, how would they take part in the conversation?

I think besides luck (my kids seem to be blessed with the bitter greens gene, for example), giving your kids time to try things and learn to like them is very important. As is making food and mealtime a pleasurable and central part of family life.

By: Molly

Molly — Mon, 08 Jun 2009 17:09:35 +0000

That sounds super frustrating. Again, I don’t think there is a magical formula or parenting technique that will get picky eaters to become adventurous eaters.

I do think, however, that there are factors that can lead a somewhat picky eater into becoming a super picky eater and, more importantly, there are plenty of things parents can do to drive themselves nuts. Just keep offering new foods, don’t turn it into a battle, and model good eating. Eventually kids will expand their diet – and at least when they grow up they can’t blame you for not showing them how to eat well.

By: citi

citi — Mon, 08 Jun 2009 16:12:47 +0000

You know, I wholeheartedly agree with your principles, but I do think the luck component is a big one.

We have been trying to apply the same principles to our daughter, with no luck! We her parents are hearty, omnivorous, REALLY adventurous eaters, love food, cook all the time, don’t prepare anything “just for the kids”, and eat at regular times, at the table.

Yet, no luck: she will only eat white stuff: pasta, rice, cereal, milk….. turns up her nose at even the most prosaic of veggies: no carrots, peas, sweetcorn….. only saving grace is that she loves (some) fruits and will eat broccoli and spinach.

We are at our wits’ end. It’s been two years of putting family dishes in front of her hoping she will eat.

By: RS

RS — Sun, 07 Jun 2009 15:50:19 +0000

Great article. I share your disdain for children’s menus, especially because the choices are usually bland junk food. And you’re right that, if you begin the practice of making special separate meals for your kids, you are entering dangerous territory. There are plenty of things I like that my 8-year old still won’t try, but she’s getting more adventurous all the time. We are lucky to live in the Bay Area — there are so many wonderful food choices here, and we rarely have a shortage of local produce!

By: Madeline Morrow

Madeline Morrow — Sun, 07 Jun 2009 10:11:16 +0000

As someone who loved all kinds of food and variety, I exposed my first son to many kinds of food, and he ate everything – until he was about four. He started rejecting one thing after another. I insisted he try everything. If he didn’t like the meal, I would make him a peanut butter or a turkey sandwich on whole wheat bread until he was old enough to do it himself. I didn’t want to have battles over food, but the rule was at mealtimes he had to eat the meal or some healthy alternative. We went to lots of restaurants, and as long as they had some kind of fairly plain chicken with rice or noodles he would eat. Kids don’t have as many taste buds as adults, and liking very plain food is a phase that many seem to go through. They will probably grow out of it.
At about 8, he started adding foods back. Now he is 22 and eats pretty much every vegetable, but is still somewhat picky about meat. His antipathy toward cheese is probably because of lactose intolerance. He cooks well and calls me for advice on topics like the best way to cook kale or what fruits and vegetables are in season.
My younger son never was as picky, and became an adventurous eater earlier – but his personality is totally different than his brother’s.
My conclusion: the environment and expectations around food and eating are important – but your child has his or her own personality that is also a very strong influence on how they eat.

By: AnnabelleR

AnnabelleR — Sat, 06 Jun 2009 22:12:08 +0000

Great article! I don’t have children of my own, but I wish two friends had tried to raise their kids this way. I find them unreasonably picky, to the point where the 10 y/o throwing a tantrum when his Dad forgot to say “no pickle” on a McD’s hamburger. He wouldn’t remove it himself, his Dad had to do it for him! But the kids are no less adventuresome than their parents are: plenty of white sauces, canned soup casseroles, and shiny processed cheese.

How I grew up to hate only a few things (parsnips, horseradish/dijon, dark chocolate) I’ll never know. My Mom overcooked all vegetables (but I could eat anything fresh out of the garden) and did unspeakable things to perfectly good beef. It doesn’t sound like your readers are like that, but it wasn’t until I started dating that I realized why other people liked steak! And pizza didn’t come out of a Chef Boyardee box with cheddar cheese, and bits of blackened hamburger!

I’m adventuresome in spite of my parents, not because of them. So I think there just might be hope for anyone!

By: G

Sat, 06 Jun 2009 21:47:44 +0000

About a year ago, I wrote a ‘food philosophy’ entry in my own diary. If it instead had been a blog, I would have sworn that you stole my thoughts.

This is an incredibly well-written post, with such common sense, sound-minded thoughts.

Not only will your child continue to grow as a good, well-balanced eater, but I have a feeling your child will be a good, well-balanced human being too. Kudos to you and your husband!